In the last couple of months I’ve been thinking a lot about how what/who we look at is what we start to look or be like. At the ripe old age of 12 I started to mimic and look like those around me, those that I saw and hung out with everyday. As it’s only natural to want to fit in, my character qualities started to take form. Even though I grew up going to church and reading the Bible every week in Sunday school and listening to messages in my very uncomfortable pew, it didn’t really have an impact on who I was becoming. Needless to say my friends influenced me more than my church, do you see the problem? I can place blame on either party here; my friends didn’t support who I was so they wanted me to become who they think I should be and my church didn’t seem to understand what Jesus meant when He said to make disciples…but I won’t blame either side. Given free will I had the power to choose. I must say that going with the flow of the crowd was much easier.

Why is this important right now? Why bring this up? The past is the past and I have a great testimony because of it, but what’s the point?

²⁸ Moses was there with God forty days and forty nights. He didn’t eat any food; he didn’t drink any water. And he wrote on the tablets the words of the covenant, the Ten Words.

^29-30 When Moses came down from Mount Sinai carrying the two Tablets of The Testimony, he didn’t know that the skin of his face glowed because he had been speaking with God. Aaron and all the Israelites saw Moses, saw his radiant face, and held back, afraid to get close to him.

^31-32 Moses called out to them. Aaron and the leaders in the community came back and Moses talked with them. Later all the Israelites came up to him and he passed on the commands, everything that God had told him on Mount Sinai.

^33-35 When Moses finished speaking with them, he put a veil over his face, but when he went into the presence of God to speak with him, he removed the veil until he came out. When he came out and told the Israelites what he had been commanded, they would see Moses’ face, its skin glowing, and then he would again put the veil on his face until he went back in to speak with God.        Exodus 34:29-35

Instead of seeking the face of God, I was seeking the acceptance of man. From then on my face became like everyone around me, I was an Israelite when I needed be Moses. My face needed to be glowing because I had just been with the Lord. The relationship that Moses had with God is available to all of us, we need to decide if we are going to look at Him and therefore become like Him. Or if we are going to look at this world and become like it. I’ve made the mistake of looking at the world and allowing myself to become an Israelite. I want my face to glow.

The Lust for Money

2-5These are the things I want you to teach and preach. If you have leaders there who teach otherwise, who refuse the solid words of our Master Jesus and this godly instruction, tag them for what they are: ignorant windbags who infect the air with germs of envy, controversy, bad-mouthing, suspicious rumors. Eventually there’s an epidemic of backstabbing, and truth is but a distant memory. They think religion is a way to make a fast buck.

I’ve always wanted to be in ministry as a pastor, director, something with a nice title. It has never gotten to the point of a few of these negative characteristics that Paul is talking about. I know that the Message is translated a little differently but I love the way he puts it, “ignorant windbags.” I can’t help wanting to be on staff at a church running a missions program or starting a successful college or high school group. It’s been a dream of mine for a while and I must say i’ve thought exactly what it says at the end, “They think religion is a way to make a fast buck.” It’s only been in the last 6-12 months that I’ve really come to the conclusion through much conversations with the Lord that I’ve realized my time will come, when I quit lusting after money…

^6-8A devout life does bring wealth, but it’s the rich simplicity of being yourself before God. Since we entered the world penniless and will leave it penniless, if we have bread on the table and shoes on our feet, that’s enough.

So that’s pretty much the conclusion that the Lord has brought me too, “bread on the table and shoes on our feet, that’s enough.” I also understand that when I am constantly pursuing God that all things will be put into place as they are needed. The devout life can do nothing but bring good things and all God wants from us is ourselves, humble and true, just us.

^9-10But if it’s only money these leaders are after, they’ll self-destruct in no time. Lust for money brings trouble and nothing but trouble. Going down that path, some lose their footing in the faith completely and live to regret it bitterly ever after.

You can ask my wife how many times I’ve self-destructed over where my jobs have taken me and where I wish I was going instead. My desire for money at times has been so overwhelming that it ruins the very thing that brings life, my devotion to the Lord. I must say though, I have never lost my faith, God has provided and I am in no way bitter about my life!

Running Hard

^11-12But you, Timothy, man of God: Run for your life from all this. Pursue a righteous life—a life of wonder, faith, love, steadiness, courtesy. Run hard and fast in the faith. Seize the eternal life, the life you were called to, the life you so fervently embraced in the presence of so many witnesses.

Let it rain Paul! I just need to get this tattooed on the backs of my eyelids so I can see it while I’m sleeping. What a charge! This lines up perfectly with what I’m reading at the moment. A book about changing our generation and the way we view church. I’m 2.5 chapters in and my spirit is stirred to no longer stand on the sidelines and watch my generation fall. I’m tired of watching bitterness, anger, frustration and abandonment take over. My generation is one that wants to do it all on there own and be put into positions of leadership without wanting to do the hard stuff. The truth is we can get anywhere on our own, we need the generation and generations before us to guide and disciple. We need to be willing to look at ourselves and see the holes that need to be filled. We need to run from the world and into the loving arms of the fathers and mothers in our churches and homes. I’m tired of watching.

I’m not interested in being paid for my efforts anymore. I just don’t want to see my generation fall short of  “a righteous life—a life of wonder, faith, love, steadiness, courtesy.”

The latest, that we’ve all heard about is Tiger Woods. He has tried his hardest to keep all of this in the dark and out of the media. I think that’s a great idea! Why would you want the entire world to know about what’s going on? Let’s give the man his privacy! The line that I saw that was really the worst today was, “Tiger’s wife beat him because she is jealous.” Yea, that’s the feeling you have when your husband is having an affair, jealousy! How about anger? Disappointment? Betrayal? But jealousy? I think that might be there, but most likely rage! Death to both parties! (that’s a little harsh but you know what I’m saying) I just wonder when we can leave celebrities alone and let them have there issues in private. Most people try and keep those things covered as it is, as long as it’s not going to affect the general public, give them there privacy! I know I don’t want crazy papparazzi at the hospital when my wife is giving birth, do you really think we all want to see the next batboy being born?

Anyway, this turned into a giant rant. To privacy! Ask the Lord for forgiveness, walk in the Light and live in freedom!